Where Fear meets Love

Looking outwardly there can be many things to fear. It may be fear for our physical safety or the inability to provide for our loved ones. For me (and I expect many others), when I drill down, fear is mostly about loss. Loss of ability to do the things I value. When we become fearful of loss, we can become oversensitive, over protective and can lose sight of what really matters.

It is possible to be struck by lightning. Statistically, highly unlikely but a very real possibility and every year people die and property is damaged from lightening strikes. I can live in fear and not leave the house when the weather turns or at the extreme, never leave the house. Or I can choose to become really observant of the weather conditions. A few years ago I went cycling on a frosty morning and fell on some black ice and fractured my radius. It meant a period of loss for me and I am scared of it happening again. But I love cycling and being active in nature is super important for me. So, now when it gets to 4*C or below or there is any sign of frost, I don’t go out on my bike and will rather drive to meetup with my cycling buddies or do a session on the indoor trainer. Risk management.

What was the thing that stopped me selling my bike or only cycling in summer? Love. I love moving my body and being outdoors. My wife, Janet, and I love travelling and having a sense of adventure. So 2 summers ago when our family was caught up in the Indonesian earthquakes, there were periods of genuine fear. Some people know said, “Well I’m never travelling there.” Fear will stop them experiencing all that is amazing (and challenging) in Lombok and Bali. Love is the thing that steers us to explore and experience these different cultures and places.

As we face up to real challenges and risks. We can choose to either approach them with LOVE or FEAR. When I’m on a cliff face on ChiroWild I use my fear to manage the risk. I’m very vigilant to safely clip my harness into the cables on the Via Ferrata but I open my heart to the experience of being active in Nature. I overcome my fear and that enhances my experiences. Ultimately – I choose love over fear.

One of my other highest values, is helping people generally and specifically through chiropractic. From the first moment I held someone’s head in my hands and made a thrust to move a cervical vertebra, I loved it. It felt right, natural and easy for me. Many chiropractors would agree that adjustments to the upper neck can be some of the most powerful and life changing adjustments, we as chiropractors will deliver in practice. Recently I read of a colleague, here in the UK, who had adjusted an elderly man and due to a rare set of circumstances, he subsequently died. I became “full of fear”. I would set up for an adjustment and wonder if I was missing something and be fearful that I would inadvertently hurt this person. I realised I could 1) stop adjusting the neck, 2) I could start mobilising every subluxated neck (it also helps, right?) or 3) I could make sure I check the “weather conditions” by taking X-rays and keep assessing for risk. Basically, just carry on adjusting within known safety parameters. Nothing really would change? Yet, I would still be motivated and be coming from a place of fear. Or I could choose to do all of these three things … but be motivated by love; knowing that every adjustment I give, is coming from this place. When I’m heart centred, in a loving state it doesn’t mean I’m not using my head. It just means I won’t let my head based fears, run the show.
For there is no room in LOVE for fear.

Where are you making decisions from?

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